Tough Questions: Why Do The Wicked Prosper and Christians Stumble?

I love working with teenagers. I love everything about my job but I especially love it when I receive questions from my students which show that they are thinking through tough issues. Recently, I received a question from a student asking...

"Why do individuals who do not follow God in their dating relationship appear to be prospering and having a great relationship while those who put God first are struggling to find a date and are failing in relationships?"

This is a very insightful question and one I know I have struggled with. This question can also be asked in other ways like, "why am I sick with cancer as a Christian but unbelievers live healthy lives" or "why do I attempt to put God first but my marriage failed" or "why do I get passed over for a promotion as a Christian but my unbelieving friends are always getting promoted?"

While I could take time to answer the nuances of each individual question I will take a few minutes and answer the question in bold and hopefully my answer will apply to the other questions...

First, let me applaud you for asking such a great question. Asking a question of this caliber shows that you are reading and thinking through the Bible. It is a very good thing to think through the teaching of the Bible and attempt to apply the Bible to your life. I applaud you and wish there were more students thinking through the Bible like you are.

Second, Psalm 73 helps to answer your question in fact the author of Psalm 73 had a very similar question. He looked around at evil men who were prospering and began to ask why they were succeeding in life and he was not. Psalm 73:3-5, "For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. For they have no pangs until death; their bodies are fat and sleek. They are not in trouble as others are; they are not stricken like the rest of mankind." The wicked seem to go through life in good health, and then die a painless death or to put it in your words the wicked seem to have dating relationships which prosper and look fun without any cares or worries.

The author continues to count the ways the wicked prosper and the righteous struggle up until verse 17 which is when the chapter switches perspective (But when I thought how to understand this, it seemed to me a wearisome task until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I discerned their end) and as the Psalmist worshiped God at the worship center, he began to understand God's perspective on the fate of the wicked.

He realizes in verse 20 (Like a dream when one awakes, O Lord, when you rouse yourself, you despise them as phantoms) that the wicked are like a bad dream which one forgets as soon as he awakens. Their well-being is fleeting. Have you ever had a dream and were unable to remember it by the time you arrived at school? That is the fate of those who do not know God or who choose not to follow God they may prosper for just a little while but in the end no one; even worse God will not them. Relationships among people who do not honor God may prosper for a season maybe even a long season but in the end God and other people will not remember them.

The author goes on and contrasts the fate of those who do not honor God with the fate of those who do honor God. Look at verses 23-28, "Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. Who have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you. But for me it is good to be near to God; I have made the Lord GOD my refuge, that I may tell of all your works." 

May I encourage you not focus on what you can see (ungodly relationships prospering) focus on what you can't see (God is guiding your life and using this season of singleness to prepare you for the spouse He has for you. God is guiding your life and using this season of singleness to prepare you for the glorious future He has for you.)

God is a good good father. The wicked may prosper for a season even a long season but in the end God will not take them by the hand and lead them to Heaven instead He will forget them like a bad dream.

However,

The righteous ones know God and are known by Him. He knows everything you are going through and He is using all of these circumstances, events and this season of singleness to prepare you for the future He has for you. God not only knows you in this life but at the end of your life He will come and take you by the hand leading you to Heaven which is fullness of joy and pleasures forevermore. Please, do not grow weary in doing good (seeking to honor God in your relationships) because at the right time God will reward you and lift you up. The path of obedience in following God's will is typically hard but always worth it. Trust Him!

The path of obedience following God's will is typically hard but always worth it!

In conclusion, may I encourage you not focus on what you can see (ungodly relationships prospering) focus on what you can't see (God is guiding your life and using this season of singleness to prepare you for the spouse He has for you. God is guiding your life and using this season of singleness to prepare you for the glorious future He has for you.) The path of obedience following God's will is typically hard but always worth it!

Where Are The Soul Winners?

This past Sunday we had a Gideon (Do you know those Bibles in the hotels? Yea, they're placed there by Gideons). He shared a powerful video about the power of evangelism and than he talked a few minutes about the number of Bibles handed out and the lives impacted by the Gideons.

Did you know that every time your heart beats two Bibles are handed out by the Gideons?

After the service I went up to the Gideon to talk with him. We were making small talk and I was sharing with him about my Grandfather in law who used to be a Gideon and how much I appreciated their work. He stopped me in mid-sentence and said, "You know what keeps me going as a Gideon?" I politely smiled and said, "no." He looked at me with tears in his eyes and he said, "the reality of Hell keeps me going as a Gideon. I think of the torture of Hell and the reality that everyone who doesn't know Christ will go there when they die. I share my faith with witches, warlocks, atheists, agnostics and everyone I meet even though I am old because I can't get the thought of people going to Hell out of my mind. I think of how Hell has no hope and is eternal separation of God and I just want to tell everyone about Jesus Christ and his plan for salvation." He then looked at me, smiled, and concluded by saying, "I guess I am just an old fashioned soul winner. Not a whole lot of us anymore I reckon."

His concluding sentence has bounced around in my head all day. I can't help but asking myself, "where are the soul winners?" Where are the young men and young women daily opening their mouth and gossiping the Gospel?  Where are the pastors, church planters and missionaries sharing Jesus Christ with everyone they meet rather than holding up in an office for sixty hours a week? Where are the men and women sharing Jesus Christ?

I know a lot of young men and young women who are passionate about sex trafficking, eliminating poverty, homelessness, the environment, HB2, discipleship, theology, reformed theology, small groups, planting churches, the list could go on and on but I can count on one hand the number of young men and young women who are passionate about evangelism.

I frequent several blog sites including The Gospel Coalition, Desiring God and Acts 29 all of which are good and helpful but very rarely do I read a blog about evangelism and how to draw the net and challenge people to accept Jesus Christ.

But...

Where are the evangelists? Where are the street preachers? Where are the young men and women who have the Gospel so burning in their soul that they have to open their mouth and proclaim Christ's Gospel? Where are the young men and women who understand that Hell is hot, eternity is long, and millions are on the road there and so we must beg and plead with people to turn from their sin and trust in Christ? Where are the soul winners? Statistically evangelism is at an all time low within the Southern Baptist Convention; maybe, it's time we stop trying to be cool, modern and relevant and return to the basics of soul winning.

Where are the young men and women who understand that Hell is hot, eternity is long, and millions are on the road there and so we must beg and plead with people to turn from their sin and trust in Christ? 

Luke 10:2, "And Jesus said to them, "The harvest is plentiful, the the laborers are few. Therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest."
Proverbs 11:30, "... whoever captures souls is wise."
Matthew 28:19, "Go therefore and make disciples of all nations..."
Acts 5:28, "...they filled Jerusalem with his teachings."

I am not sure how to end this blog, but to circle back and repeat myself....

Where are the evangelists? Where are the street preachers? Where are the young men and women who have the Gospel so burning in their soul that they have to open their mouth and proclaim Christ's Gospel? Where are the young men and women who understand that Hell is hot, eternity is long, and millions are on the road there and so we must beg and plead with people to turn from their sin and trust in Christ? Where are the soul winners?

Should We Fly Flags in the Sanctuary on National Holidays?

This weekend is Memorial Day and a lot of churches will be having special Patriotic services to honor our men and women who have paid the ultimate sacrifice for our country. National holidays always bring up an interesting angst/question in my soul.

Is it OK to fly our National flag in the Sanctuary on special occasions?
Does honoring America take away from the Kingdom of God?
What will Internationals think when they visit our church & see an American flag?
Is it wrong to honor our country?

Lest you think I am the only one who struggles with these questions; let me assure you I am not. The other day I attended a Pastor's lunch and learn with other Pastors in our Association and the question about flying flags in the Sanctuary on special holidays came up and led to a great conversation with a lot of helpful insight.

Before I attempt to answer the question for myself allow me to give you some background which shapes my worldview. I grew up an Air Force brat. My dad proudly served in the Air Force a number of years before retiring. My brother is serving in our Armed Forces and has served overseas. I grew up going to air shows and honoring our military. I have also visited nine different countries and lived overseas in Ghana, Africa for two years. Both of these perspectives have tainted my worldview and obviously affected the answer to this question.

So what's my answer:

I believe it is OK and even encourage the flying of flags/honoring of  our military in the Sanctuary on National Holidays and specials services. (To be honest: I think we should acknowledge our men and women in uniform any time they visit our church in uniform).

I believe it is OK and even encourage the flying of flags/honoring of our military in the Sanctuary on National Holidays for four reasons.

1) Memorial Day, 4th of July and Veterans Day represent three Sundays out of the year. Three Sundays!?!?!?! In the whole scheme of things that is not a lot of time taken out of the church calendar to honor those who have served, our serving and who have given the ultimate sacrifice so that we may live in America with our freedoms. We owe our myriad of freedoms in this country to our men and women in uniform and we should remember them and thank them.

2) Soldiers serve 24/7, 365 days out of the year to protect us. They serve in the cold, heat, rain, snow, sleet, hail, sun, blistering humidity, etc. They encounter situations which I can not even imagine. They serve with very little pay and very little thanks. The least we can do as a church is pause for 2 maybe 3 Sundays out of the year and say thank you.

3) We live in the greatest country on the planet. There is a reason everyone overseas wants to move to America and that is because of the greatness of our country. Other countries are good but America is great! We are the greatest country in the world because we have the greatest military in the world and we should be remembering them and thanking them for their service.

4) I am often reminded of the stories I have heard about war and the price men and women have paid. The rest of us do not have to bear the costs those men paid because they volunteered to pay them on our behalf. Every day they went to work knowing the risks.

In the military, such sacrifice is so common that at times it almost ceases to seem extraordinary. But it has echoes and glimmers of what is most incredible in Christian faith: that one would willingly lay down his life for his friends. Greater love has none than this, and even the extreme pacifist doesn't scorn it. This is one of the reasons why our flag is not out of place in a church.

This holiday may I encourage you to fly flags in the Sanctuary, turn up the Toby Keith, sing it loud and proud that you're proud to be an American and remember/honor the men and women who have sacrificed and are sacrificing that you and I may enjoy the freedoms we have and the privilege to live in the greatest country in the world!

Our soldiers not a politician make America great!

Imago Dei: The Image of God

All our lives we've heard that we're "made in the image of God." It's a nice thought, and probably one we've clung to when we need a reminder of our own value. But have you ever stopped to think about what it really means? "Made in the image of God" is an audacious claim—and one that probably carries some responsibility with it. We all know we are not gods—though if we're honest, we know we often think we are the god of our own lives, even if we'd never admit it. The truth is, you are not God. But you are godlike.

Our confusion about whether or not we are God arises from our godlikeness. It's described in the first chapter of the Bible. Genesis 1:26-27 reveals, "Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, in our likeness' ... So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them."
To be fully human is to fully reflect God's creative, spiritual, intelligent, communicative, relational, moral and purposeful capacities.

So, what does it mean to be created in God's image? The Hebrew root of the Latin phrase for image of God—imago Dei—means image, shadow or likeness of God. You are a snapshot or facsimile of God. At the very least this means humans occupy a higher place in the created order because we alone are imprinted with godlike characteristics. Your godlikeness is the path to your greatest fulfillment. You will feel the greatest pleasure and wholeness when who God made you to be is fully developed and expressed.

Your godlikeness can also be a pitfall, because in our hubris we often confuse being like God with being God. Mystery writer Nevada Barr learned this after returning to faith from her long sojourn on the wild side, and concluded: "It was a number of years of crashing and burning before I made the discovery that I was not God. Finally I realized that though I was not God, I was of God."

But in what way are you an image of God? How are you godlike? Theologians have long debated this question, but the answer becomes clear when we read the description of God in Genesis 1 and then ask: If we could take a snapshot of God, what would we see and what would it reveal about humans created in God's image?

First, the truth about you is that you are creative because God is creative: "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth" (Genesis 1:1). We know that God is creative. Every human makes things. Artists make things with paint. Poets, writers, philosophers and lawyers make things with ideas and the compelling use of words. Doctors make people healthier; consultants make organizations better. Manufacturers make things with raw materials; chefs make things with fruits, vegetables, meats and spices. Every human has the capacity to make things, to create, because we are all made in the image of a creative God.

The second truth about you is that you are spiritual because God is Spirit: "The Spirit of God was hovering over the waters" (Genesis 1:2). Every human possesses spiritual aptitudes and capacities. We are more than the sum of our physical parts. Our spiritual nature, though unseen, is as real as our physical nature. Nurturing our spirit is as important as eating, drinking and exercising are to our physical body.

A third truth about you is that you communicate because God communicates: "God said, 'Let there be light'" (Genesis 1:3). Anthropologists agree that the emergence of symbolic language—first spoken, then written—represents the sharpest break between animals and humans. The human ability to think and reason, to use language, symbols and art, far surpasses the abilities of any animals. This gift was bestowed when the communicative God's image was imprinted on us.

A fourth truth about you is that you are intelligent because God is intelligent: "In the beginning was the Word [logos, a Greek word meaning reason, or logic] and the Word was with God, and the Word was God" (John 1:1). Logical sequential thought flows from the orderliness of God's mind. As a result, though we are not all intellectuals, we each possess a mind and a way of thinking and learning, so Jesus commanded us to love God with our minds (as well as our hearts and all our strength). Because of God's intelligent image imprinted on our lives, though we possess different kinds of intelligence, each of us is to develop our mental capacities to their fullest.

A fifth truth about you is that you are relational because God is relational: “Let us make man in our image, in our likeness. ... It is not good for man to be alone” (Genesis 1:26, Genesis 2:18). The phrase, "Let us make man in our image" reveals an "us-ness" in the very nature of God. The very essence of God is relational, and that essential quality has been imprinted on humans. This capacity for a relationship with God extends to humans, which is why the Genesis story declares that God created Eve for Adam because "it is not good for man to be alone."

A sixth truth about you is that you are morally responsible because God is a moral being. “And the Lord God commanded the man, ‘You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die’" (Genesis 2:16-17). Just as there are natural laws that govern the universe, universal moral laws govern human behavior. The Bible teaches that these laws are written on human hearts and are universal.

When we fully grasp what it means to bear God's image, we are at once struck with the grandeur of our possibilities and the tragedy of our unrealized potential. To be fully human is to fully reflect God's creative, spiritual, intelligent, communicative, relational, moral and purposeful capacities, and to do so holistically and synergistically. Furthermore, though all humans possess these godlike capacities, each of us has the potential to express them distinctively, because God's image has been imprinted uniquely on each of us. In God's infinite creativity there are no duplicates; you are the only you there has ever been or ever will be.

Seven Reasons Why Faithful Church Attendance Matters:

Here are seven reasons why faithful attendance to church practically matters:

1. Faithful attenders confirm the power of the gospel and support evangelism, whereas non-attenders make evangelism harder. 

Jesus said, “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35). Jesus prayed for the unity of his disciples “so that the world may believe” the Father sent the Son into the world (John 17:21). For the world to see our love and unity, then, we must regularly gather together.

Everyone who bears the name of Christ—as affirmed by a local church calling them a “member”—yet who willingly chooses to live their lives apart from the covenanted community of believers is practicing identity theft. They’ve taken Christ’s name, but they don’t honestly identify with his body, the local church. Living unaccountable lives, they make evangelism harder for other Christians because, often, they aren’t living like Christians.

2. Faithful attenders confirm Christ-centered lives for new believers, whereas non-attenders confuse them.

New believers need good models (Acts 18:24–26; 1 Cor. 11:1; Titus 2:2–6). When the doctrine they’re taught doesn’t sync with the models they see in the absentees, they become confused. They’re led to believe one can be a “Christian” and yet have little or no connection to Christ’s body. Non-attenders are not only reverse witnesses (see the previous point); they’re reverse models. They disregard and disobey countless passages of Scripture and fail to image God’s character in the most basic ways, even though they claim to be his adopted children.

3. Faithful attenders encourage other regular attenders, whereas non-attenders discourage them.

One reason to gather regularly is for the sake of personal encouragement: “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near” (Heb. 10:24–25). When a church allows non-attenders to remain members, they effectively gut the meaning of membership, which hurts and discourages the faithful.

4. Faithful attenders comfort their leaders by their adherence to the truth, where non-attenders worry them.

Hebrews 13:17 says, “Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account.” In light of this verse, a faithful pastor or elder should feel responsible for the spiritual state of every member of his flock. Like a father worried about his child who hasn’t come home late at night, a good shepherd doesn’t rest until all his sheep are accounted for. Non-attenders make this task nearly impossible.

5. Faithful attenders are positioned to exhort, correct, and encourage their fellow members according to God’s Word, whereas non-attenders are not.

Because of their absence, non-attenders cannot possibly know when or how the other members of their church community are burdened by sin or suffering. When church members are present and engaged, on the other hand, they can speak the truth in love to one another, just as their Lord exhorted through the apostle Paul: “Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love” (Eph. 4:15–16).

6. Faithful attenders will steadily grow in respect to their salvation, whereas non-attenders will not.

“Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation” (1 Pet. 2:2). Since God has appointed specific means by which Christians grow in their faith, neglecting those means will stifle spiritual health and growth. Hearing the Word of God preached, singing the Word of God in corporate worship, and serving the body of Christ according to the Word of God are just a few examples of graces given to us for our sanctification. And they are primarily available to those who gather faithfully with the church.

7. Faithful attenders will be helped to persevere in faith, whereas non-attenders endanger their souls.

While it’s true we are saved by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone, it’s also true God uses the local church to help us persevere in saving faith. In the book of Hebrews, we find that one of the primary ways God guards us from apostasy is through the spiritual strengthening of other believers (Heb. 3:12–14; 10:19–31; 12:25–13:17). As made clear in all the previous points, we need other believers to help us fight sin and follow Jesus. This means that while your attendance at church does not earn your salvation, it is something God uses to help you persevere in faith and enter into that final rest laid before us in Christ (Heb. 4:6–16).

Tough Question: Who Made Satan?

Satan. What images does that word conjure up for you? An evil creature with horns, a tail, and a pitchfork? A cute kid in a red cape, ringing your doorbell on Halloween?

Cultural caricatures aside, Satan is the personal being whom Christians know as the great deceiver, the archenemy of God and his people.

Scripture says a lot about his character and actions—who he is and what he does—but what about his origins? Where did he come from? Who created the Devil?

Chatty Snake

The story of the Bible opens with creation, with God declaring the universe into being. The first two chapters are a breathtaking scene of order and wholeness and flourishing. No wonder the Maker surveys everything he’s crafted and pronounces it “very good” (Gen. 1:31).

Then, suddenly, a snake. But this isn’t any ordinary snake; this one talks. In fact, it’s quite chatty. Before we know it, the slithering creature has struck up a conversation with Eve, luring her and her silent husband—and you and me—into a revolt against God. As the story unfolds, it becomes clear this ancient serpent is a scaly manifestation of Satan himself (Rev. 12:9).

Genesis of the Devil

The Bible never explicitly tells us where Satan originated. He presumably came into existence sometime after the creation of God’s perfect world (Gen 1:31) prior to his appearance in Eden (Gen. 3:1). Despite these unknowns, however, there are at least five things we can say with certainty.1

1. God created Satan.

Scripture proclaims all things were created by God and for God (Rom 11:36; 1 Cor. 8:6; Col. 1:16–17). It makes sense, then, that this comprehensive category—“all things”—includes even the Devil. After all, if God wasn’t “behind” Satan’s creation, then who was? Another powerful being? If so, then that being would, at least in one sphere of existence, be in charge. There would be a realm over which God wouldn’t be in full control.

2. God created Satan good.

As the source of all goodness, beauty, and truth, God creates only what’s consistent with his nature—things that are themselves good, beautiful, and true. Every facet of creation, whether in heaven or on earth, was originally “very good.” As Paul simply observes, “Everything created by God is good” (1 Tim. 4:4). His character is wholly pure; there isn’t a shred of darkness or deception in him (1 John 1:5; James 1:13). And Satan was created as an angel to serve and honor this great God.

Obviously, something went wrong.

3. Some created angels rebelled against God.

On two occasions the New Testament speaks of a time when angels turned on God and fell into wickedness:

God did not spare [the] angels when they sinned, but sent them to hell, putting them in chains of darkness to be held for judgment. (2 Pet. 2:4)

The angels who did not keep their positions of authority but abandoned their proper dwelling—these he has kept in darkness, bound with everlasting chains for judgment on the great Day. (Jude 6)

According to Scripture, there was once an angelic insurrection against heaven’s King.

4. Satan has authority in the realm of demons.

As the “prince of demons,” it seems likely that Satan launched and led this heavenly revolt (Matt. 12:24). Satan, then, was the first sinner; indeed, he’s “been sinning from the beginning” (1 John 3:8).

The devil’s position as captain of the demonic forces is unmistakable. Scripture refers to him as “the evil one” (Matt. 13:19), “the ruler of this world” (John 12:31), “the god of this age” (2 Cor. 4:4), and “the prince of the power of the air” (Eph. 2:2). We witness him spearheading attacks on God’s people (Job 1:6; 1 Chron. 21:1; Zech 3:1), with “power” (Acts 26:18) to “bind” (Luke 13:16) and “oppress” (Acts 10:38).

“Fallen angels are not treated as evil by creation but as followers of Satan in his mutiny,” Michael Horton explains. “At one time the most glorious and powerful angelic agent, Satan was filled with pride and plotted the attempted heavenly coup.”

5. Satan’s evil came from within himself.

No one was around to tempt and lure Satan into sin; his evil arose from within. It’s not surprising, then, that Jesus would call him “the father of lies” and “a murderer from the beginning” (John 8:44)—language hearkening back to the very outset of history.

What About Lucifer?

There is a possible allusion to Satan’s fall from heaven in the Book of Isaiah. As the prophet is describing God’s judgment on the king of Babylon, he veers into language that seems too grandiose to refer to any mere human:

How you have fallen from heaven,

    morning star, son of the dawn!

You have been cast down to the earth,
    you who once laid low the nations!
You said in your heart,
    “I will ascend to the heavens;

I will raise my throne

    above the stars of God;

I will sit enthroned on the mount of assembly,

    on the utmost heights of Mount Zaphon.
I will ascend above the tops of the clouds;

    I will make myself like the Most High.”
But you are brought down to the realm of the dead,

    to the depths of the pit. (Isa. 14:12–15; cf. Ezek. 28:1–19)

The King James Version translates “morning star” as “Lucifer,” a name meaning “bearer of light.” Though common in religious vernacular, this name doesn’t appear in most modern translations of the Bible.

In sum, while it isn’t certain that this passage alludes to Satan’s pride and subsequent fall from heaven, it definitely could.

Lingering Questions

“There are two equal and opposite errors into which our race can fall about devils,” noted C. S. Lewis in The Screwtape Letters. “One is to disbelieve in their existence. The other is to believe, and to feel an excessive and unhealthy interest in them.”

We are swimming in the deep end of the mystery pool, with many unanswered questions on which the Scriptures are simply silent. How could a morally pure creature rebel against God? Why did the other angels join the revolt? When did all of this happen?

Even though Christians don’t know all the answers, we know the God who does. And we know that “the reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil” (1 John 3:8).

If you’re following King Jesus, take heart. Your enemy was defeated (Col. 2:13–15), he is being defeated (Eph. 6:10–20), and he will be defeated (Rom. 16:20). Yes, he “prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” (1 Pet. 5:8), but at Jesus’s death he was defanged, and at Jesus’s return he’ll be destroyed.

In the meantime, his havoc extends only as far as God’s hand allows.

Answering the Transgender Question:

We are raising our children in a different world than the one we grew up in. The transgender issue does not appear to be going away anytime soon and I believe sooner rather than later we will be forced into a conversation with our children about our transgender neighbors or a transgender individual they saw on television. Here is what I will share when the day comes that Piper and/or Bryant have questions.

God Made Gender

I will remind my kids that way back in the early pages of Genesis it says that God created gender: “Male and female he created them” (Gen. 1:27). We don’t get to choose our gender. Whether one is male or female is in the creative power and wisdom of God. Someone may struggle with “feeling” male or female, but that doesn’t make him or her different than God intended.

In the beginning, God determined that two genders were the perfect expression of his image. In the man and in the woman, then, God’s image is displayed—both in the individuals themselves and in the way they relate to each other as same (human) and as distinct (gender). One isn’t better than the other, nor did God design a way for humanity to switch between the two.

We All Struggle with Identity

I want my kids to be able to adequately navigate the waters of sexual identity for themselves. This is a watershed issue in our day that isn’t going away.

So I will explain clearly to them how this young man or young women they met identified himself more as a woman or vice versa. We will then talk about how everyone struggles at some level to understand who they are and why God made them the way he did. I will reassure them it’s normal to wrestle with such issues of identity, but that gender identity in particular is determined by God, and that transgender expressions won’t “fix” what’s going on within. I want them to know that any “gender transitioning” is a shortsighted attempt to fix a common human struggle, and will likely add to the confusion a person already feels.

Where Worth Is Found

Ultimately, though, I want my kids to have empathy for this young man or young woman. They can see from his demeanor and physical mannerisms that he wasn’t doing well. In fact, he’d told me he recently had a mental breakdown and was getting some neurological tests to determine what was going on.

I want my kids to fight the natural bent of their hearts to judge and snicker. I want them to show the grace and compassion that arises from feeling the hurt someone else carries with them. I want them to deeply understand who they are before the Lord—and even if they don’t get that far, that they at least understand who God made them to be. I want them to grasp that without careful answers, you can start down a path that only leads to greater confusion and heartache.

The gospel-less culture around us champions being who you are, but offers only tips and tools that lead you away from being who God created you to be. So absolutely, I want my kids to be themselves. I want them to look different from my wife and me. I want them to have their own adventures, to walk their own paths. But I also want them to be equipped to find their worth in Jesus, so they can help others navigate the tricky roads ahead. I want them to know that they and everyone they meet has value, worth and dignity because everyone is created in the Image of God.

6 Lessons My Son Needs From Me:

I love my little girl, but I also love my little boy. There are numerous things that are needed by both—things like support, affection, encouragement, confidence, prayer, etc. But there are also some things that need special attention for each gender. I became acutely aware of this when my son was born. My little girl needs specific things from her daddy. But there are also specific things that my son needs from me as well.

A brief list can never cover everything. But, let me mention some essentials that my little boys need from me.

To be pure. A war rages around us and the enemy seeks to devour us (I Peter 5:8). For most men, sexual temptation is constant and powerful, and the enemy uses every opportunity to entice us to indulge sexual sin. The result is destruction, for men and women. Fathers, our sons need our help. But how can we help if we are plagued by this sin. Our little boys need us to be pure and to protect them from the attacks of the enemy.

To be a gentlemen. Little boys look to their fathers to see how to live and behave. They watch our every move and seek to emulate what we do. This is especially true when it comes to the way we treat women. If we are rude, unkind, or mistreat women, then they will too. We have to be deliberate to put a good example before them.

To do guy stuff.  Every day, from the moment I get home, my son craves my attention. He wants me to play pickie boo, hide and seek etc. In the future I am looking forward to wrestling, throwing a ball, playing basketball, or getting out my tools and fixing his bikes. Our little boys need a daddy to get out there with them and do boy stuff.

To balance gentleness and strength. Our culture offers a variety of misguided views about masculinity. One misguided approach suggests that boys are always tough, no matter what. Don’t get me wrong, we need strong men and strong boys more than we’ve ever needed them. But we also need men that know how to balance strength with gentleness. As St. Francis de Sales once noted, “Nothing is so strong as gentleness. Nothing is so gentle as real strength.”

To model leadership and responsibility. We lament the way that men are portrayed in films, TV shows, and literature today. We’re often portrayed as childish, perverted, lazy, selfish, domineering, and much more. But these portrayals arise from reality, at least partially. Sadly, men often are like this. If we hope to change this, we must be deliberate about the way we raise our sons. They need to see us exercising honorable leadership.

To love Christ. Finally, just like with our little girls, our little boys need to see their daddy loving and obeying Jesus. Praise God for godly moms, but they need to see this embodied in us. If we are spiritually passive, they will be too.

Dads, no one can impact your boys as much as you can. Your role cannot be overstated. If you lead and model well in these ways, your boys are very likely to follow. If you neglect this responsibility, however, your boys will be the poorer for it. I’m praying for you today as you love your boys!

Monday Morning Humor:

Wednesday Worship:

Wednesday Worship:

Monday Morning Humor:

Wednesday Worship:

Monday Morning Humor:

10 Thoughts A Toddler Has Between 12-5 AM:

While adults enjoy sleeping during the twilight hours (lazy), the space between midnight and 5AM is, for advanced toddlers, a period of reflective thought and general scheming.

Here are 10 thoughts your toddler has between midnight and 5AM.

1. "Why do I, the youngest and most vulnerable person in the house, have to sleep alone when my parents sleep together? Surely, this is some kind of administrative error. I will fix it."

2. "I wonder what's in the fridge? Do we still have string cheese? I will go investigate."

3. "I wonder how much pee pee it would take to overflow my diaper transforming my bed into a marsh-like environment? There's only one way to find out."

4. "My stuffed animals seem to have fallen out of formation. I know a special lady who would love to help me organize them."

5. "I see that my infant sibling is sleeping soundly. I know how to fix that."

6. "Is the TV working right now? Let's check. As a family."

7. "You know what would be very cozy? Me sleeping in the Big Bed with one leg across mommy's face. I find it soothes her."

8. "This feels like as good a time as any to ask for a Band-Aid."

9. "I wonder how long the fall is from my crib to the floor. I will investigate."

10. "You know what I haven't done in awhile? Screamed so loud it alerted the neighbors. I miss that."

Original Article: http://www.thehonesttoddler.com/2016/03/10-thoughts-your-toddler-has-between.html

My Gap Year:

Malia Obama will graduate high school this month, but she won’t begin her work at Harvard until fall of next year. She’s taking a “gap year” – a year off between high school and college.

Malia is not alone. The New York Times claims the gap year is growing in popularity.

“The idea is that university-bound students go on an adventure, do something meaningful and, if all goes to plan, arrive at campus a year later more mature, focused and attuned to their goals.”

My Gap Year

I’m familiar with the gap year because I took it, too, back before the practice had a name. After high school I was unsure of college and what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I took a year off and worked as a Lifeguard at Great Wolf Lodge and Volunteered at a local Fire Department.

If you think it’s just a “yearlong postponement of schoolwork,” as the New York Times article opens, then you’re missing the point. My gap year was busy. I worked, got involved in local business associations, volunteered at a Fire Department (ran into burning buildings and provided basic medical care in the back of an ambulance).

Not everyone liked the idea then, and people still worry about it now. One of my teachers, upon hearing my plan, shook his head and said, “Elliott, if you don’t go to college this fall, you’ll probably never go.”

I was taken aback.

Looking back, I have to admit my teacher was right about the statistics. In 1999, there was a much higher likelihood that failing to go straight from high school to college would lead you to abandon plans for future education.

But when it comes to what was the best decision for me, my teacher was wrong. My gap year, in which I lived at home as an adult, taught me how to juggle work, family, and how to save money. I was able to detach from the peer pressure of just following the crowd of classmates into various colleges and universities. The gap year sowed the seeds for my eventual move to Liberty University. The gap year changed the course of my life. The gap year gave me some time to sort out my goals and my gifts, and then make a bold step.

Can You Afford a Gap Year?

Today, many experts claim that a gap year leads students to perform better in college and to end up in more satisfying careers. The push back is that only rich people can afford such a thing. Malia’s decision was criticized on social media for being out of touch with the real world.

Considering the cost of college these days, the bigger question is not “Can we afford a gap year?” but “can we afford college?”

In my experience there was something about the daily grind of working and volunteering at the Fire Department that taught me to value my future education. The year between high school and college gave me time to think, to plan, to dream. I didn’t take a gap year because I had money, but because I needed money… and time, to figure out what should come next.

Consider the Idea

Every student has different goals, gifts, and dreams. It would be foolish to recommend all high school students take a gap year, just as it would be foolish to forbid such a thing. But I hope more Christian parents and students will at least consider the idea.

An education in life is just as valuable as an education in books. Gap years give you time to grow.

May Parent Newsletter:

For Parents on the Go:

1. Camping Trip at Pilot Mountain State Park. Friday, May 20-Saturday, May 21st. Cost: $10. We are in need of camping supplies for this weekend. If you have any we could borrow or you want to go with us please let me know.

2. Mission Fuge Summer Camp. June 20-24.

3. Graduate Recognition Sunday. Sunday, June 12th. We will be celebrating all graduating seniors on Sunday, June 12th in both services. Please contact Pastor T for more information.

4. Summer Meals. Once school finishes for the summer we will once again be serving meals on Wednesday nights at 6:00 pm for all middle/high school students. Cost: $3.

As you probably are aware the LGBT agenda has reached a fever pitch. I have spent a lot of time and energy thinking and praying about and for the world my children will grow up in. Below are ten principles for raising children in a LGBT world.

1. Talk honestly and openly about sin, homosexuality, the LGBT community, and gay marriage with your children.
We live in a post-Genesis 3 world.  Because of this, sin is a reality, both in our lives and in the lives of our children.  Part of the goal of parenting is teaching our children to love God and hate sin.  Using your conscience as a parent, and discerning the appropriateness of their age, talk openly with your children about homosexuality and gay marriage.  Unless you live in the mountains, have no technology, and your children have zero friends, I promise they are already chatting about this issue with their friends.  Six, seven, and eight-year-olds are already having these conversations in lunch rooms and on school playgrounds.  Your children’s classmates might have 2 mommies or 2 daddies.  Too often, parents want this to be a hush hush issue with their children until later in middle or high school.  By then, it’s too late.  As your conscience, the Holy Spirit, and Lady Wisdom guide you, talk honestly and openly about this issue with your children.

2. Model to your children a marriage that is a picture of the gospel.
As Owen Strachan put it, speaking about gay marriage (President of Center for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood), “Let’s allow this decision to shock us back into taking stock of the log in our own eye. Let’s use it to motivate us to dig into our marriage and truly love our God-given spouse. Let’s recommit to loving our children in a distinctly biblical way. May this Supreme Court decision awaken God’s people to display the beauty of complementarity as never before, to put the union of a self-sacrificial head to his loving bride on IMAX display wherever we are.”  As Strachan alludes, the home is the most foundational place for your children to learn the gospel and see it modeled.  Let us recommit to pursuing our marriages before anything else.  Let us model to our children the entire gospel within our marriages–servant headship, submission, grace, repentance, and restoration.

3. Teach your children the biblical foundations for marriage.
Teach your children the foundation for marriage from Genesis 1-2, the mysteries of its relationship between Christ and the Church in Ephesians 5, and how marriage ultimately wins when Jesus returns in Revelation 19.  Talk about this often with your children.  Show your children often pictures and videos from your wedding.  Never talk poorly about marriage.  Elevate it as the most important pursuit.

4. Teach your children the biblical foundations for sex.
Many parents are waiting until late in middle school to talk with their children about sex for the first time.  Again, in my opinion, this is too late.  I would encourage somewhere around 4th, 5th, or 6th grade to truly begin the “sex talk” with your children.  A good way to start this conversation is for dads to take sons, and moms to take daughters, on what is called a purity weekend.  Take your children somewhere fun, do more expensive things (because this weekend should be awesome), and begin the conversation about sex with your children.  Notice I said begin.  This is not a one-time conversation.  This needs to be an ongoing discussion with your children.

5. Protect your children from the influences of pornography.
Like a warrior fighting his enemy on the battle field, may parents fight to protect their children from the influences of pornography!  This is not a light task.  Some researchers have stated that the average age of first exposure to pornography is down to eight.  Eight!  I’ll repeat, EIGHT!  Children can access pornography on any device in the home today (cell phones, television, iPads, computers, gaming systems, and more).  What is more, Covenant Eyes is a great filtering software you can put on your devices.  Teach your children why this filtering software is on your devices.  It’s not because you don’t trust them (which you shouldn’t, though), it’s because we want to put guardrails in our lives and completely crush any form of temptation to sin.

6. Pray fervently for and with your children.
As the influences of culture creep closer to our doorsteps, let us pray fervently for the hearts and minds of our children.  The battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the spiritual forces of this world (Eph. 6:12).  Let us pray that God would protect, build up, and send out our children into the world as ambassadors for Him (2 Cor. 5:20).

7. Partner with a gospel-centered local church that will come alongside you and teach the truths of Scripture.
Discipleship primarily happens in the home, but the local church should also be a great resource for equipping and building up your family.  So often, parents view the local church as the center of discipleship.  It’s not.  As parents, that is your job.  The local church should come alongside of you in teaching your children the truths of Scripture.

8. Teach your children biblical gender roles.
As you teach marriage and model marriage to your children, it is important to teach your children biblical gender roles, too.  Men are designed by God to be leaders, providers, and protectors in the home.  Women are designed by God to be helpers and nurturers in the home.  Men and women are equal in dignity, value, and worth, but different in role and function.  This is powerhouse complementarianism.

9. Train your children towards courageous biblical manhood and womanhood.
Being a man who practices the marks of mature biblical manhood is completely counter-cultural–and likewise for women who practice mature biblical womanhood.  We are called by God to pass down the truths of manhood and womanhood to the next generation (Titus 2).  We pass these truths and characteristics down by teaching and modeling them.

10. Don’t panic.  Trust in God.  He is still in control.  His plan will still win.
The sky is not falling.  The world is not going to hell.  God is still in control.  Let us live with this bold posture.  Talk with your children about this issue just like you would about any issue.  As Christians, we are “sent into” the world to seek the redemption of the world (Rom. 8) and be instruments used by God in the building of his Church (Matt. 28:16-20).  Remember, we are “sent into” the world by our Chief Commander armed with truth & love.  We await His triumphant re-entry.  For Christians, nothing changes.  Same mindset.  Same posture.  Same mission.  Same victorious King.  When we understand this, we realize that love (and truth) wins.

Reaching, Teaching and Releasing,

Pastor T