Marriage is hard work. It is also worthwhile work. One of the ways we work through difficult times is by seeking to bless our mates. This is a wonderful path to reconciliation, and it gives evidence of our Lord’s redeeming work in our lives. What follows are some specific ways we can bless our spouses. This list is by Dr. Danny Akin and can be found in his commentary on the Song of Solomon:
A husband can be a blessing to his wife by loving her as Christ loved the church and giving specific gifts of love:
1. Be a spiritual leader. Be a man of courage, conviction, commitment, compassion, and character. Take the initiative in cultivating a spiritual environment for the family. Become a capable and competent student of God’s Word and live out before all a life founded on the Word of God. Lead your wife in becoming a woman of God, and take the lead in training the children in the things of the Lord.
2. Give her personal affirmation and appreciation. Praise her for personal attributes and qualities. Praise her virtues as a wife, mother, and homemaker. Openly comment her, in the presence of others, as a marvelous mate, friend and companion. Help her feel that, to you, no one is more important in this world.
3. Show personal affection (romance). Shower her with timely and generous displays of affection. Tell her how much you care for her with a steady flow of words, cards, flowers, gifts, and common courtesies. Remember, affection is the environment in which sexual union is enjoyed more fully and a wonderful marriage is developed.
4. Initiate intimate conversation. Talk with her at the feeling level (heart to heart). Listen to her thoughts about the events of her day with sensititivity, interest and concern. Conversations with her convery a desire to understand her not to change her.
5. Always be honest and open. Look into her eyes and, in love, always tell the truth. Explain your plans and actions clearly and completely because you are responsible for her. Lead her to trust you and feel secure.
6. Provide home support and stability. Take hold of the responsibility to house, feed, and clothe the family. Provide and protect, and do not feel sorry for yourself when things get tough. Look for concrete ways to improve home life. Raise the marriage and family to a safer and more fulfilling level. Remember, the husband/father is the security hub of the family.
7. Demonstrate family commitment. After the Lord Jesus, put your wife and family first. Commit time and energy to the spiritual, moral, and intellectual development of the children. For example, pray with them (especially at night by the bedside), read to them, engage in sports with them, and take them on other outings. Do not play the fool’s game of working long hours, trying to get ahead, while your children and spouse languish in neglect.
A husband can be a blessing to his wife by loving her as Christ loved the church and giving specific gifts of love:
1. Be a spiritual leader. Be a man of courage, conviction, commitment, compassion, and character. Take the initiative in cultivating a spiritual environment for the family. Become a capable and competent student of God’s Word and live out before all a life founded on the Word of God. Lead your wife in becoming a woman of God, and take the lead in training the children in the things of the Lord.
2. Give her personal affirmation and appreciation. Praise her for personal attributes and qualities. Praise her virtues as a wife, mother, and homemaker. Openly comment her, in the presence of others, as a marvelous mate, friend and companion. Help her feel that, to you, no one is more important in this world.
3. Show personal affection (romance). Shower her with timely and generous displays of affection. Tell her how much you care for her with a steady flow of words, cards, flowers, gifts, and common courtesies. Remember, affection is the environment in which sexual union is enjoyed more fully and a wonderful marriage is developed.
4. Initiate intimate conversation. Talk with her at the feeling level (heart to heart). Listen to her thoughts about the events of her day with sensititivity, interest and concern. Conversations with her convery a desire to understand her not to change her.
5. Always be honest and open. Look into her eyes and, in love, always tell the truth. Explain your plans and actions clearly and completely because you are responsible for her. Lead her to trust you and feel secure.
6. Provide home support and stability. Take hold of the responsibility to house, feed, and clothe the family. Provide and protect, and do not feel sorry for yourself when things get tough. Look for concrete ways to improve home life. Raise the marriage and family to a safer and more fulfilling level. Remember, the husband/father is the security hub of the family.
7. Demonstrate family commitment. After the Lord Jesus, put your wife and family first. Commit time and energy to the spiritual, moral, and intellectual development of the children. For example, pray with them (especially at night by the bedside), read to them, engage in sports with them, and take them on other outings. Do not play the fool’s game of working long hours, trying to get ahead, while your children and spouse languish in neglect.
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