10 Promises for Parents:

You probably have a book mark somewhere with promises to pray for your children. You probably have good kid verses on your refrigerator about obedience and kindness and sharing with others. You probably have a few standby verses you share with the little ones when they start to get defiant and lippy. All good.

But do you have any verses for yourself?

My kids need Bible promises, but on most days I need them even more. I’m prone to wander, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I want them to love.

So here are ten promises from the Bible that every Christian parent should remember, especially the Christian parent writing this blog.

1. “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness” (James 1:2-3). Since the verse refers to trials of various kinds, I assume that James is talking about more than martyrdom and death. Sleepless infants, tortuous bedtimes, muddy feet, spilled orange juice, moody teens–they all count too. And we should count them all joy, even when they feel like the biggest pain. God promises he’s at work to produce steadfastness.

2. “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you” (James 4:10). You’re tired, scared, defeated, weary beyond all reckoning. Good. Get low, and God promises to lift you up.

3. “Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain” (Psalm 127:1). It doesn’t depend on me. It’s not about me. My kids are not for me. Stop freaking out. Stop trusting in horses and chariots.

4. “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward” (Psalm 127:3). They are. They really, really, truly, actually are. Whether you have one child or two or ten or twenty, God has given you those children because he loves you. The world thinks they are burdens. God tells us they are blessings.

5. “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). Yup, that verses is for parents too. The anger in our kids is from their hearts, but the mouthy way they learn to express that anger may be from our example. Why do I think my gasoline will help put out their fires?

6. “Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city” (Proverbs 16:32). The only way to be a strong parent is to be a parent with self-control.

7. “My yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:30). Parenting is hard work. Period. But parenting up to the expectations of your (fill in the blank: mother, mother-in-law, girlfriends, next door neighbor, own little taskmaster) is impossible. Parent for Christ’s sake. He promises not to weigh you down with impossible burdens.

8. “Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God” (Hebrews 13:16). God knows that you sacrifice your time, your desires, your sleep, your money, and often your own dreams for your children. He sees and he smiles.

9. “Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean, but abundant crops come by the strength of the ox” (Proverbs 14:4). Everything is a mess, all the time. What else did we expect? We have dirty oxen running around. But there’s joy, memories, laughter, sanctification, and gospel growth from those wild animals too.

10. “But he gives more grace” (James 4:6). Ah, sweet grace. Grace to forgive your impatience (again) and your laziness (again). Grace to get you off the ground. Grace to get you walking. And grace to lead you home.

Author: Kevin Deyoung
Original Article: 10 Promises for Parents

6 Keys to Bed-Breaking Sex:

On Friday, February 13, 2015 Hollywood will release “50 Shades of Grey”. The movie is based on E.L. James's best-selling trilogy in which sweet, quiet Anastasia Steele's (Dakota Johnson) life changes when she meets billionaire Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan). The book series is immensely popular and one can expect the movie to be as well. 50 Shades is notable for it's explicitly erotic scenes featuring elements of sexual practice involving bondage/discipline, dominance/submission, and sadism/masochism (BDSM).

Sadly, the popularity of the book and the oncoming popularity of the movie have revealed a problem in America. The problem in America is that more married couples are unfulfilled in the bedroom and our looking to books and movies to fill their God-given sexual drive.

I strongly believe more couples should be having “Bed-Breaking Sex.”

When you and your spouse improve your sex life, you’ll simultaneously improve your marriage. It’s as simple as that. It takes a lot more than a great sex life to build a great marriage, but it’s nearly impossible to build a great marriage without it!

As I’ve interacted with couples, I’ve discovered that there seems to be an epidemic of unfulfilling sex (or sometimes no sex at all) happening in modern marriages. This tragic neglect or misunderstanding of sexuality has the potential to wreck a marriage. Don’t let that happen!

So how can you get bed-breaking sex? Every couple is different and there is rarely a “one-size-fits-all” approach to anything, but I’m convinced that these six basic principles would instantly improve the sexual fulfillment in most marriages. Give them a try! This is the kind of “homework” you’ll actually enjoy.

These first three apply BEFORE sex:

Make foreplay an all-day event.

Foreplay shouldn’t start thirty seconds before you plan to have intercourse (I’m talking to my fellow men out there on this one)! Find ways to flirt with each other throughout the day. Send flirtatious and/or thoughtful text messages to let your spouse know they’re on your mind. Those consistent little acts will help set the mood for romance later.

Tell your secrets.

One of the biggest barriers to true intimacy in marriage is a lack of trust. Your spouse needs to feel completely safe and secure with you to fully engage in sexual intimacy. Secrecy is an enemy of intimacy, so make sure you’re communicating consistently, openly, and honestly at all times. Your transparency will create trust and that trust will ultimately create better sex (and a better marriage).

Serve each other.

You should serve each other throughout the day so that your spouse’s mind can be freed up to enjoy the moment. Husband, this might mean washing the dishes or folding laundry. Wives, this might mean giving your husbands a back rub to help him relax. Find ways to serve each other and you’ll be building a bond of intimacy before you even get to bed.

These next three apply DURING sex:

Tell your spouse what you like (and what you don’t like).

Your spouse is not a mind reader. Be open and honest about what feels good and what makes you uncomfortable. Communication is vital to a mutually pleasurable experience.

Have fun!

If you’re not having fun while you’re having sex, then you’re doing something wrong! Bring your sense of humor. Be playful. Be adventurous. If it always feels like work, then talk to your spouse about the issues that might be holding you both back.

Be mentally monogamous. 

Don’t bring outside “fantasy” into your bedroom. Both your body and your mind have to be fully present in the moment, so don’t allow porn or erotic romance novels to put images in your mind that will create fantasies that don’t involve your spouse. True intimacy requires monogamy (both physically and mentally).

In conclusion, bed breaking sex will not happen by viewing “50 Shades of Grey” or other pornographic movies. Rather, bed breaking sex will only occur through foreplay, communication, serving each other, having fun and being mentally monogamous.

Wednesday Worship

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Wednesday Worship

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Monday Morning Humor:

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Wednesday Worship:

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Wednesday Worship

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Wednesday Worship:

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Wednesday Worship:

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Wednesday Worship

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Wednesday Worship:

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Wednesday Worship:

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Wednesday Worship:

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Monday Morning Humor:

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Monday Morning Humor:

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The Art of Saying No

I have been a Christian for nine years and have been actively involved in church, and full-time vocational ministry since becoming a Christian. I have observed an epidemic among Christians and those in the church. This epidemic is suttel and at times disguises itself in the form of Godliness and self-less service but in reality is ungodly and is killing the church and burning out Christians. The epidemic I have observed over the years is the inability of Christians to say, "No". Christians for whatever reason have a hard time saying, "no". This is especially true for Christians in the South who do not want to offend. This epidemic among Christians being unable to say no is leading to a generation of church members who are over-committed, neglect family and burn-out, eventually, falling away from the church.

If you are someone who finds yourself always saying "yes" to requests to help out around the church and never "no" allow me to map out three effects of always saying yes and never no.

• If you continue to say "yes" and never "no" you will lose your joy for the Lord and your joy for ministry. Do you find yourself looking around and wondering why no-one else helps or shows up? Do you find yourself loudly sighing or complaining about having to go back to church to work? If so, may I politely, but firmly tell you that you are losing your joy. You are being overworked and maybe need to say no more often.
• If you continue to say "yes" and never "no" you will burn out. You can only take so much. Eventually your lack of joy will spill over onto others, people will not want to be around you, you will eventually snap, throw up your hands and walk away. We need seasons of rest because we can not do it all. If you continue to say yes and never no you will burn out.
• If you continue to say "yes" and never "no" you will eventually walk away from the church. On Monday nights at the church where I work we have a ministry which visits those who are members of our church who have not been for a while. The purpose of the ministry is to care for others and invite them back to church. I can not tell you the number of times I have sat down with a family to talk to them about why they are no longer attending and they inform me that they have burned out. I often hear them say that they need a break. Sunday is the only time they spend together as a family and don't want to get up early and come to church. If I delve into their past, I more often than not discover a family who was very involved in church but over-committed themselves and have since left the church.

Always saying yes and never no, leads to a loss of joy, burn out and could eventually lead to you walking from the church. If you have read this far in the post you must be following along with my logic and you may be asking, "OK. I understand their is a problem but how do I say no." Below is a list of helpful steps in helping you say no when someone comes and asks for help.

• Practice. Practice saying no. Go into the bathroom, shut the door and practice looking into the mirror and saying no. If you are married, ask your spouse to approach you and ask you to help out and practice saying no. Make sure she understands what you are attempting to do because she might smack you if not. 
• Have rightly ordered priorities. The Bible teaches us that our priorities should be God, family, and than ministry. When we get these priorities confused we say yes to activities which take us away from our time with God and our time with our families. 
• Understand that saying "no" to good things will free you up to say "yes" to the best things. For example, I was approached by several people in our church to referee Upwards Basketball and/or be a head coach for Upwards Basketball. Both of these responsibilities would have taken me away from my family multiple nights a week and I would have been committed to be at church every Saturday until March. This would take me away from spending time with Piper while she was young. I said no to a good thing (Upward) to say yes to the best thing (spending time with my family).
• Understand that when you say "no" to someone it is not personal. I fear that the majority of people are saying "yes" in church not because they want to do something but because they are afraid of offending someone if they say "no". May I very nicely tell you to stop worrying. Stop trying to do everything. Stop trying to carry everyone else's burdens because truth be told they aren't yours to carry. Stop telling yourself that you owe everything to everyone. Stop saying yes to every favor and responsibility.
• Saying no is biblical. In the New Testament there is a principle of the Sabbath or a principle of rest. You need to rest. You can't do everything. The Sabbath is God's gift to us. Stop saying "yes" to everything and say "no" to a few things to insure that you are able to enjoy a Sabbath rest.

Always saying yes and never no will lead to a loss of joy, burnout and possibly to walking away from the church. To avoid these scenarios I have charted several steps to implant to begin to say no more often. There is a principle which I use in my own life and ministry to help direct my life. This is a principle and should not be held legalistically.

The principal is that everyone should be involved  serving in two areas of ministry. Everyone should volunteer and serve in an area of ministry outside of the church and everyone should volunteer and serve in an area of ministry inside the church. Now some people because of their personality will be able to serve in three or four ministries but the majority of us are only able to serve in two. If you are a Sunday school teacher, don't also commit yourself to serving in choir, Upwards, visiting shut-ins, etc. Focus on one thing in the church and do that one thing to the best of your ability and to the glory of God. Also, don't ONLY serve in the church but also serve in your community. For example, you can volunteer in the local school, coach a local sports team, serve on the PTA, etc but don't volunteer at a local school, coach little league, volunteer at the fire department, attempt to do everything in the community and also serve in the local church. Focus on one thing in the community, do that one thing to the best of your ability and to the glory of God.

In conclusion, I have observed that Christians struggle to say no and are over-committed. This over-commitment is leading to a loss of joy, burn-out, and an exodus of members from the local church. Christians need to learn the art of saying no. Finally, Christians should cut back and be involved in two areas of ministry. One area of ministry inside the church and one area of ministry in the local community. When we always say yes and never no we lose our joy, burn out and leave the local church but when we learn the art of saying no, we discover a joyful life filled with self-less acts of service to our community and to the Lord through the local church.

Monday Morning Humor:

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Happy Birthday

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! Hope you eats lots of ICE CREAM & CAKE...

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How To Share Your Faith With Co-Workers:

“For this is the will of God, that by doing good you should put to silence the ignorance of foolish people.”-1 Peter 2:15

When we interact with people on a daily basis, we have many opportunities for sharing our faith. First, be sure you are respectful to your employer and set a good example in your work ethic by working “as to the Lord” (Col. 3:23). When others around you grumble and complain, if you have a calm, forgiving, steadfast spirit, it will make an impression. As you respond in a Christlike way to angry coworkers and stressful circumstances, people will see a difference in your life.

If your boss forbids it, don’t witness on work time. Instead, keep a pile of tracts on your desk but don’t give them out. If someone asks for one, let them take it. Displaying a favorite Scripture or a devotional calendar, or quietly reading your Bible during lunchtime, may prompt others to inquire about your faith.

To not infringe on your employer’s time, invite unsaved coworkers out to lunch (not the opposite sex) and witness to them there. Just ask for their thoughts on what happens after death. That will let you know if they are open to the gospel. If you detect contention, apologize and instead use closet prayer. Make a list of workers and uphold them before God, asking for divine openings.

In the meantime,  let your love shine. Always be friendly and courteous, and show genuine interest in your coworkers’ lives. Share their joys and sorrows by congratulating them in their good times and offering to pray for them in their bad times. Be sure you do pray for them, then follow up by asking them about the situation you prayed for. They will be moved by your concern. If coworkers are discussing what they did during the previous weekend, you can share your excitement about attending church services or a special church event. Ask about their plans for celebrating Christmas or Easter; be nonjudgmental of their answer, and be ready to explain why you celebrate as you do.

Bringing home-baked goods or leaving a small gift with a note on a coworker’s desk can sometimes have a greater impact than a thousand eloquent sermons. We can show our faith by our works. Others may not like a tree of righteousness, but they cannot help but like its fruit.

Divine Appointment:

And Jesus had to pass through Samaria.-John 4:4

John 4 records a familiar story of Jesus’s divine appointment with the woman of Samaria. This story is one of the more popular stories which John records and has been taught and expounded on by many Pastors, teachers, and lay-persons. A few weeks ago I was preparing a youth Bible study on John 4 and noticed something interesting. John 4:4 states, “And Jesus had to pass through Samaria.” I couldn’t help but wonder, why did he have to pass through Samaria. Was it because of geography? Was there another route? Or was there something more going on? I had commonly heard it taught that Jews repudiated Samaritans and considered them heretical. Intense ethnic and cultural tensions raged historically between the two groups so that both avoided contact as much as possible. After further study I learned that passing through Samaria was the usual route taken by travelers from Judea to Galilee, though strict Jews, in order to avoid defilement, could bypass Samaria by opting for a longer route.

As I contemplated the verse I began to realize that if there was another route for Jesus to take than he didn’t have to pass through Samaria; therefore, I dusted off my Greek Bible. While translating from Greek to English I noticed that the word in verse 4 translated “had to” dei can also be translated “to be necessary,” and when you cross-reference this word with the other areas where it is used you begin to see a picture which indicates divine necessity. Jesus had to go through Samaria because that was the will of His Father. In other words I think John the author used the Greek word dei translated “had to” because Jesus had an appointment with divine destiny in meeting the Samaritan woman, to whom He would reveal His messiahship. There was a divine appointment which had been scheduled before the creation of the world, which was going to take place on that day, with that particular woman, at that particular well and Jesus had to go through Samaria to fulfill the appointment.

What does that mean for us? As Christians it is no accident that we live in the neighborhood that we live in. It is no accident we have the job we have. It is no accident we shop at the grocery store we shop at. It is no accident we do the things we do. EVERYTHING that happens has been and is being orchestrated by God to set up divine appointments with individuals which God desires us to share our faith with. God has gifted you, given you your personality, your experiences, placed you in your neighborhood, among your neighbors, in your workplace, among your co-workers, in your school, on your team, with your teammates BECAUSE He has a divine appointment with lost sinners which He desires you to meet. Please take time today to recognize divine appointments and share the Gospel with your friends, co-workers, teammates, and neighbors.

In conclusion, God has orchestrated events in your life today to set up a meeting with individuals whom He has chosen from before the foundation of the world to save. Will you attend the meeting and share your faith with others?

Sex Is Better:

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February=The Month of Love:

Dear friends, let us love one another, because love is from God, and everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, because God is love. God’s love was revealed among us in this way: God sent His One and Only Son into the world so that we might live through Him. Love consists in this: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Dear friends, if God loved us in this way, we also must love one another. No one has ever seen God. If we love one another, God remains in us and His love is perfected in us. This is how we know that we remain in Him and He in us: He has given assurance to us from His Spirit. And we have seen His Son as the world’s Savior. Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God-God remains in him and he in God. And we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and the one who remains in love remains in God, and God remains in him. In this, love is perfected with us so that we may have confidence in the day of judgment, for we are as He is in the world. There is no fear in love; instead, perfect love drives out fear, because fear involves punishment. So the one who fears has not reached perfection in love. We love because He first loved us. If anyone says, “I love God,” yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For the person who does not love his brother he has seen cannot love the God he has not seen. And we have this command from Him: The one who loves God must also love his brother.-1 John 4-21

February is the month of love. If you are a Christian than your life should be marked as one of love. Love for God and love for others. In stark contrast to the self-centered and destructive philosophies of false teachers and the world John unfolds the powerful reasons why Christians practice love. In 1 John 4:7-21, the apostle includes five such reasons:

1) Christians habitually practice love because God, who indwells them, is the essence of love. The gnostics (false teachers in John’s day) believed that God was immaterial spirit and light, but never defined the source of love as coming from His inmost being. As God is Spirit (John 4:24), light (1:5), and a consuming fire (Heb. 12:9), so He is love (4:7,8). Love is inherent in all He is and does. Even His judgment and wrath are perfectly harmonized with His love.

2) Christians habitually practice love because they desire to imitate the supreme example of God’s sacrificial love in sending His Son for us (4:9).

3) Christians habitually practice love because love is the heart of Christian witness (4:12). Nobody can see God loving since He is invisible. Jesus no longer is in the world to manifest the love of God. The only demonstration of God’s love in this age is the church. That testimony is critical (John 13:35; 2 Cor. 5:18-20).

4) Christians habitually practice love because love is the Christian’s assurance (4:13-16; 3:21). Love banishes self-condemnation. When a Christian recognizes in his life the manifestation of love in actions, it results in confidence about his relationship with God. 

5) Christians habitually practice love because love is the Christian’s confidence in judgment (4:17-20; 3:16-23). Confidence is a sign that love is mature. This is not to suggest sinless perfection in a Christian’s life, but rather a habitual practice of love marked by confidence in the face of judgment. Christians love, not in order to escape judgment, but because they have escaped judgment.

In conclusion, as Christians are lives should be marked by love. Love for God and love for others. When we live out our love in the midst of a dark world we will shine like bright lights in the darkness.

Julia is NOT my soul mate:

It might seem odd that on this, Valentine’s Day week, I am beginning a post with the declaration that my wife is not my soul mate. But she isn’t.

I wouldn’t want to imagine life without Julia. I enjoy being with her more than anyone else in this world. I love her more than I ever thought you could love someone, and I miss her whenever I am not with her. I wouldn’t want to be married to anyone else other than Julia, which is good, because I plan on being married to her forever, and she has to let me die first.

But I reject the entire premise of soul mates.

Do you remember those awesome Evangelical 90’s/ early 2000’s where Jesus was kind of suppose to be like our boyfriend/girlfriend and we all kissed dating good-bye because we just knew that God was going to bring us THE ONE and then life would be awesome? And THE ONE would most likely be a stay-at-home mom, or at the very least a teacher, and we would have to be in college when we would meet at some sort of rally to save children from disease or something. We would know that she was THE ONE because of her plethora of WWJD bracelets and because (duh) she had also kissed dating goodbye. We would get married and it would be awesome FOREVER.

But then we went to college and were confronted with a solid theologian biblical spiritual emphasis week preacher (thanks Clayton King) who shattered our dreams by informing us that God doesn’t have a husband/wife for us, doesn’t have a plan for whom we marry. NOT TRUE I scolded the speaker in my head attacking him with the full force of Jeremiah 29:11 that God “knows the plans he has for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me a hope and a future,” and obviously that means a hot Christian wife because God “delights in giving me the desires of my heart.”

He slammed through my horrible (yet popular) biblical abuse by reminding me that the first verse applied to the people of Israel in regards to a specific time and just didn’t even dignify my horrible abuse of the second verse with a rebuttal. Nope, he said, a wife is not only not a biblical promise, it is also not a specific element of God’s “plan for my life.” God’s plan is for us to be made more holy, more like Christ… not marry a certain person. (This advice can also be used when individuals ask what college God wants them to go to, accompanied by, “God doesn’t want you to be an idiot, so go somewhere you will learn.”)

There is no biblical basis to indicate that God has one soul mate for you to find and marry. You could have a great marriage with any number of compatible people. There is no ONE PERSON for you. But once you marry someone, that person becomes your one person. As for compatibility, all that really matters is that she loves the lord, makes you laugh, and was someone to whom you were attracted. The rest is frosting.

This is profoundly unromantic advice. We love to hear of people who “just can’t help who they love,” or people who “fall in love,” or “find the one person meant for them.”  Even within the Christian circle, we love to talk about how God “had someone” for someone else for all of time. But what happens to these people when the unstoppable and uncontrollable force that prompted them to start loving, lets them stop loving, or love someone else? What happens is a world where most marriages end in divorce, and even those that don’t are often unhappy.

My marriage is not based on a set of choices over which I had no control. It is based on a daily choice to love this woman, this wife that I chose out of many people that I could have chosen to love (in theory, don’t imagine that many others were lined up and knocking at the door). She is not some elusive soul mate, not some divine fulfillment, not some perfect step on the rigorously laid out but o so secret “Plan for My Life.”

But she is the person that I chose to ask out in college. She is the one who stayed beside me when everyone told us we shouldn’t be together. She is the one who agreed to travel the world with me and be involved in ministry. She is the person who agreed to marry me. At any step here, we could have made other choices and you know what? We might have married other people, or stayed single, and had happy and full lives.

But now I delight in choosing to love her every day.

I like it better this way, with the pressure on me and not on fate, cosmos, or divinity. I will not fall out of love, cannot fall out of love, because I willingly dived in and I’m choosing daily to stay in. This is my joyous task, my daily decision. This is my marriage.

Every day I pray for my daughter; Piper’s future. I pray for who she might marry, but also what job she will have, who her friends will be, and most of all, that she delights in becoming more like Christ. But when Piper come home starry-eyed from camp announcing that she can’t wait till the day she meets the man God has for her, I will probably pop her bubble and remind her that God doesn’t have a husband stored away somewhere for her

He has a whole life, one of rich and abundant choices. And it is awesome.

180 Movie:

In honor of National Right to Life Month here is a documentary which will open your eyes to the horror of abortion.

If you are watching from a phone here is the link: 180 Movie

CREW Youth Ministry will be filling baby bottles with coins during the month of February to help support our local pregnancy center which provides counseling, ultra-sound and mentoring to un-wed families.

An Open Letter to those Who Have Had An Abortion:

To Whom It May Concern:

Thank you very much for taking the time to click on the link. I cannot begin to imagine the deep pain and hurt which goes along with having an abortion. I can’t imagine the overwhelming grief, the regret, the shame and the remorse which you are feeling right now. Let me ask you a question, do you feel as if what you have done is too horrible to be forgiven? Do you think you will ever be able to forgive yourself? If this is where you are, than I have written this letter for you.

True forgiveness is only found in and through the person of Jesus Christ. Now, wait a minute. Don’t tune me out just because I mentioned Him. God loves you. He wants a relationship with you and He wanted it so bad that He came to earth in form (Jesus) to live among us, to tell us about Himself, and to ultimately lay down His life for us. All He asks in return is that we acknowledge that we need Him and to accept His gift of grace in exchange for our sin. Yes, I used another turn-off word: sin. Sin, sin, sin. It’s an unpopular word and an unpopular concept, almost as unpopular as mentioning Jesus. But the truth of the matter is this: We are sinners in need of a Savior. God is our Creator, and Father, and as such, loves us more than we can comprehend. There’s only one problem. God cannot allow sin into His presence. So because He loved us so much, He made a way for us to be cleansed of our sin: He became the Sacrificial Lamb. Blameless, sinless, He offered Himself up on the cross, paying the penalty so we wouldn’t have to.

If you have never acknowledged your need for Christ, I urge you to do so now. No amount of counseling or therapy or drugs will relieve the load of your guilt and sin until you accept the gift of grace God gave you when He allowed Himself to be nailed to a cross. He loves you and wants a relationship with you. He wants to be your friend, your comforter, your refuge, your hope, your peace, your joy. All you have to do is believe in faith that what He said in His Word (the Bible) is true. Then and only then will you find forgiveness, peace, healing from your abortion.

Once you’ve accepted Christ as your Savior, there are some things you need to know about true forgiveness. Such as:[1]

Forgiveness is not a feeling:

It is a choice that must be made as a conscious act of the will and has nothing to do with your feelings. The choice doesn’t change your feelings any more than your feelings nullify the choice. Make the choice is not the destination. It is only the beginning of the journey towards healing.

Forgiveness does not undo the damage or minimize the pain:

It does not sweep the conduct or the consequences under the rug where they will trip you up later. Forgiveness involves facing your feelings and dealing with them directly and honestly. Acknowledge the anger, the hurt, the guilt, the shame. But because your feelings will change daily, you must choose to anchor yourself in God’s Word that never changes.

Forgiveness is a product of God’s mercy:

If you feel that you don’t deserve to be forgiven, you’re right. Forgiveness is a free gift from God based on the shed blood of Jesus Christ at Calvary. Just as you did nothing to earn the forgiveness that leads to salvation, you can do nothing to earn forgiveness for your sin now. You must choose to accept God’s forgiveness and you must choose to forgive yourself. God commands you do so (Ephesians 4:31-32).

Forgiveness is a command:

God never commands us to do something without providing a way for us to obey Him. It is impossible to obey the command to forgive without relying on God’s forgiveness to enable you. Jesus said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible”. In time He will enable you, through the power of His Holy Spirit, to completely forgive yourself and anyone else who may have played a part in your abortion (Philippians 2:13). However, you must first decide to forgive. If you will allow Him, God will work in you to free you from the bondage of the guilt, the grief, and the shame.

In conclusion, my heart, tears and prayers go out to you. I wish we were having coffee and I could lean forward, look you in the eyes, put my hand on your shoulder and tell you that God loves you and forgiveness can be found in His Son, Jesus Christ. Will you choose the path of forgiveness today?

Serving Him,

T. Elliott Welch

[1] Info from safehavenministries.com

Monday Morning Humor:

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